10 Very Specific Questions to Ask Your Spouse

More than ten years of relationship may pass, but every day we are learning and getting to know each other better. We are not perfect and we know that there are many aspects in which we have a lot to improve. Dialogue provides this, a greater understanding of the other’s thoughts, ideas and desires.

A good conversation opens doors that are locked, helps with honest communication, makes us better understand each other, their difficulties and dreams, in addition to uniting the link of the relationship even more. There are important questions to ask in a good dialogue, so that there is more emotional interaction between the couple. 

This article stresses on 10 tips of what to talk about to improve the relationship, bring more peace and unity.

What to do. 

If initially there is any resistance to establishing good communication, use your creativity, inform your spouse that there is a game of questions and answers, that many couples are asking and that you want to do to help in the relationship. You can take a shoe box and decorate it, to make it more interesting, paint, glue stickers or wrap it with wrapping paper, leaving the lid free to remove the questions. 

You can place the ten questions separately and folded. Each will pull a paper and both will have to answer. Preferably, do this sitting across from each other, in a quiet place, without the interruption of your children or grandchildren. Use a system of gifts, such as the candies that your spouse likes most. For each positive answer one gives the chocolate to the other.

1. What do you like and dislike about me the most?

This question is very important. If you have been married for years and your spouse is not one of those who find it easy to give affection, this question will help those who hear the answer to understand what is appreciated, and will help the other to express their ideas more openly. 

In the same way that positive questions help, negative questions also provide greater understanding between the couple, where imperfections can work together and help both parties act better. 

2. What would you like to do to spend more time together?

This question will help the couple to plan activities and tours to enjoy the two. You may plan your next adventure, trip or vacation to any favorite place. This will enable you to ease stress, spend more time together and increase your bond. 

3. For you, what was the most special moment we went through together and why?

This question will help you both to know what was most special about their lives, why it was special, and what they can do to repeat that moment again.

4. For you, what was the most difficult moment we went through together?

Knowing what the other felt in a difficult or painful situation, too, will provide a connection, making the couple observe the other and their personal pains. And both will be able to support each other.

5. What do you think I need to improve and why?

There are aspects of our personality that need to be improved. This always has a greater view on the influences and consequences of our attitudes. Sometimes, we think we are right, when that is not the reality. Negative attitudes can be worked on, becoming positive. 

You can say that the other needs to be less nervous or restless to be able to enjoy life better, avoiding a health problem. In that case, study relaxation techniques together such as breathing, counting to thirty, or doing activities like yoga, meditation, physical activity, or studying the scriptures.

6. How do you feel about my parents or my family?

This question is important because, as a couple, you end up being part of each other’s family. If there is a problem in question, this is a great time to talk calmly, harmoniously and propose solutions. 

If there are many implications of one part of the family in relation to the child’s spouse, this is a good time for the son or daughter to take the initiative to talk to the parents to have more harmony, peace and tranquility between all. 

7. Is there anything at home that you don’t like?

This question will help you improve the home environment and most importantly give room for change. This question will allow both parties to air their views and help them change things for the benefit of all. 

8. What can I do to make you feel more loved and respected?

Demonstrations of affection are very important in marriage. Different people have different love languages. Knowing your partner’s love languages enables you to love them better. It may be through acts of service, gifts, words of affirmation and more. Find out how your partner wants to be loved and give them a full dose of it. 

9. What attribute would you like me to develop or improve?

Reflect with your spouse on what you need to improve. It may be your speech pattern, how you handle problems, how you relate with your in-laws, kids and more. 

10. Are you happy and satisfied with our relationship? If not, what can we do to change?

You can create other questions and put them in the box and repeat this activity from time to time or whenever you feel necessary. Remember that the rewards are an incentive to continue with good attitudes, you can vary in this system, not to just stay in the chocolates, you can buy a nice gift (even without a specific occasion) and give your spouse at the end of the questions, as a show of affection, respect, affection and love. 


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