WAYS TO HANDLE A CHILD WITH BAD BEHAVIOUR. Are you a parent and you are confused about how to handle your child’s difficult behavior? As a parent, you’ve probably had to deal with your fair share of meltdowns and tantrums and regulating emotions is often a skill every parent has to learn. But it can be very frustrating when some children take longer to master their self-control than others.
Of course you may feel that it is also the responsibility of the grandparents and the teachers to correct unruly behavior in children, and while it is essential to be sensitive to your kid’s emotional and social development, it is also important for you as the parent to teach the child how to behave, react and control their feelings.
Heck, it’s something they would pick up from watching you anyway!
But before we look at how you handle this bad behavior, you need to first understand the possible triggers. By the time your kids are old enough to be able to verbally communicate their feelings – somewhere around 7 years old – physical expressions of aggression are meant to subside. However, if this isn’t the case, you need to look out for warning signs like if the child is struggling academically, finding it difficult to relate with other kids or just constantly causing disruptions at home.
In this situation, you are looking at a case of bad behavior. So now let’s look at the 6 ways in which you can handle such bad behavior in your child.
Believe me, when I say it can be pretty tempting to start a screaming match with your little one, especially when you haven’t been getting enough sleep, are always late to work and your kid decides to vehemently stick to the idea that shoes aren’t for them. Very tempting, sure, but certainly not wise.
Look at it this way, could it be the child is modeling you by getting into frequent outbursts of disappointment and anger? No matter how stressed, emotionally disturbed or overworked you are, how you handle it would certainly have an effect on your kids.
So the first rule is to learn to control your emotions. Remember that an outburst from a toddler is age-appropriate but screaming back at the child definitely isn’t. Have you noticed that when you yell at your child, they only yell back or start crying so loud that you can’t even get any word in?
Learn to stay calm during the crisis, just like those air traffic controllers and you’ll be able to handle whatever your toddler throws at you – except ice-cream, no one is ever prepared for that. Haha!
REWARD GOOD BEHAVIOUR
Whenever your children exhibit good behavior and deeds, don’t hesitate to applaud them. Find moments when they behave appropriately or are respectful and generously praise them either with your words or with rewards.
Never make the mistake of giving materialistic rewards, like a new toy, instead, it should be something simple and thoughtful like a new book, a chance to play with their friends or some extra time to try something new.
By focusing on their good behaviors, you not only help the child understand that bad behavior isn’t rewarded with any attention, but you also change your own perspective of the situation. By doing so, you find yourself better equipped to deal with the screaming outbursts.WAYS TO HANDLE A CHILD WITH BAD BEHAVIOUR.
FIND THE SOURCE
Small changes in the life of your child can manifest as bad behavior without any obvious links. On the other hand, there is often a clear link between your kid’s mood and whether he/she has had too much sugar, is tired or is hungry. You may not know this but kids thrive on routine. If that is messed up, they can rebel with bad behavior.
Identify the things that make your child tick and you’d be well on your way to dealing with tantrums.
Having a consistent routine is important for maintaining harmony in your home, the same way it is for dealing with bad behavior.
If you just laugh it off when your child crams a slice of bread in the DVD player the first time, well, don’t be surprised if the child tries it again. And again. If you decide right from the beginning what is acceptable and what is not, and you are consistent in your approach to disciplining the child, you’ll find this helps to curb bad behavior.
DON’T GIVE IN
Have you ever been in a situation where you are at the mall or in a store and because your kid wants a particular cereal or candy, all hell breaks loose? In that situation, you are more likely to buy it just to get the kid to shut up. But here’s the thing, doing that only rewarding and rewarding inappropriate behavior. And trust me, that kid will do it over and over again.
So next time your child throws a tantrum because he/she wants something, don’t give in, let the child understand that only good behavior deserves rewards. WAYS TO HANDLE A CHILD WITH BAD BEHAVIOUR
DON’T ANNOUNCE TO THE WORLD
Many Nigerian parents are fond of reporting their kids to others like their friends and relatives. “Can you imagine the rubbish I had to go through because of this naughty child today?” They might say. They label the child as a problem child without actually trying to delve deeper into the problem. And it’s worse when you do it in front of the child.
Next time you decide to call your parents to tell them what a hellish time you had at the store or the mall with your unruly child, you are likely going to make the child feel important and inspired to do it again. So please, never discuss your child’s bad behavior with others in front of your child. Rather, highlight the times your child was well behaved, or the times they improved on something.
This makes the child more likely to want to repeat those good behaviors rather than the bad.WAYS TO HANDLE A CHILD WITH BAD BEHAVIOUR.