A one-night-stand has ruined my marriage’

Bayo Ajibola

My name is Olamide, a 32-year-old mother of two. I have been married for three years to Zubby but our marriage is on the verge of collapse due to a silly mistake I made by engaging in a one-night-stand with my ex-boyfriend.

I call it a silly mistake because I allowed myself to fall into the temptation of sleeping with Mike who came into the country after almost 15 years in the USA.

I know that many of your readers will blame me and call me all sorts of names; that is understandable as I have also blamed myself so much and cried to God to forgive me but Zubby is not ready and willing to forgive me after he found out what I did.

I was dating Mike right from my secondary school days and he was the first man to have sex with me. I was so much in love with Josh and I never thought a time would come that I would ever be separated from him until he traveled to the USA.

I was heartbroken but he kept assuring me that he would come back for me but after two years, he stopped communicating and all attempts to get through to him were abortive.

Even his close friends and relations did not know what had happened to him or they refused to give me his contact.

For 10 years, there was no news of Mike and as I was no longer getting younger. My parents advised me to move on with my life and forget about him.

I was dating now and then but no man could ever be like my Mike. In fact, I had the problem of always comparing any men I dated and none of them could hold a candle where Mike was concerned.

Then I met Zubby and though I did not love him as much as I loved Mike, he was able to make me forget the pains in my heart. Zubby loved me so much and when he proposed, I had to accept.

Our marriage all these years have been great till Mike appeared from nowhere and shattered everything.

I was surprised when a strange number called me in the office and it turned out to be Mike.

He told me he had been in the country for over a month and really wanted to see me. I wanted to see him as well but I never ever thought our meeting would lead to sex.

On the day we were supposed to meet, I told my husband I was going to see my sister and would come back late. I met Mike at an eatery and without knowing why, I felt a rush of the love I had for him sweeping over me.

After our meal, he took me to the hotel he stayed and one thing led to the other and we ended up having sex.

I could not go back home that day and called Zubby to lie that my sister was not feeling too well and I had to sleep over.

In the morning, while going back home, I felt so much guilt but with the determination that such would not happen again.

A month later, I did not know how, Zubby woke me up one night and accused me of seeing my ex and even having sex with him. He described how we met and how I slept with him in his hotel room.

I was so shocked that I confessed to him and begged for his forgiveness but he would not hear of that. The next morning, he threw my things out of the house and forbade me from ever stepping into his house.

ALSO READ‘I love my wife so much but she keeps cheating on me’

I have sent his friends, relatives, and even our pastor to beg him but Zubby has refused to forgive me.

Can someone out there tell me what to do before I lose my marriage?

Olamide.”


Bayo Ajibola

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