Being in a relationship makes us more vulnerable to a number of things, including betrayal. When we trust our partner this can be an even bigger thump, since loyalty and fidelity in a relationship is often expected.
What is betrayal for each person? This is a concept that is sometimes very subjective, especially in an era where the virtual can often be equated with the real. Regardless of any understanding, the truth is that it causes suffering and usually, trauma.
This article will help you learn more about how to overcome the trauma of betrayal in the following ways.
1. Put all the feelings out
Trying to be strong at these times is not one of the smartest decisions. If you are feeling angry, demonstrate it in an appropriate space through words. Letting go of the pain in a wrong way can have irreversible consequences, so it is not best to let your emotions get the best of you. If you want to cry, do so.
If your desire is to isolate yourself from the world for a few days, do so. Follow your heart at that moment. You can only overcome a betrayal when you manage to put everything out. It seems that the pain will never go away, but from the moment it is expressed, it goes away.
2. Don’t blame yourself
Blaming yourself at these times is common. You always try to find out where you went wrong for the betrayal to happen. But regardless of your mistakes, nothing justifies a betrayal, if that was the basic rule of your relationship. Everyone makes mistakes in a relationship, so when you reflect you will find several points. Don’t blame yourself, just try as much as possible to let go.
3. Don’t think everyone is going to do this to you
After a betrayal we are more suspicious than ever. It is natural. But taking this into your life and into your next relationships will bring you a lot of suffering and may even prevent you from having an incredible relationship with someone truly special.
Each person is unique. It is not because the ex betrayed you by lying, or staying with someone else, that the current one will betray you in the same way. People are different and you’ll meet someone who loves you and treats you with so much respect.
For you to be truly free from the pains of a betrayal, you need to forgive the person. Yes, this may be quite difficult to do but it is important for you and your mental health. Forgiving may not necessarily mean you have to forget, forgiving is letting go of the pain and getting rid of the suffering.
To forgive is to let all the bad feelings that are in your heart leave you but you must do this in your time. There are people who can forgive in the first week, others take several weeks or months to digest the whole situation. Often, going through a situation of betrayal can strengthen you and make you learn to like yourself more and take better care of yourself.
5. Take care of yourself
If there is something that destroys any self-esteem, it is betrayal. Feelings of rejection, of lesser importance, are the most difficult to be absorbed, especially if you have to live with those who betrayed you as long as they would like. But it can be useful to understand that what you consider as loyalty is something that has a lot of value for you and sometimes other people are not always prepared to offer it in a relationship.
To overcome this trauma, start taking care of yourself , resume your interests, take care of your appearance and all the pertinent actions so that your self-esteem is recovered.
When we managed to make this rescue, we also saw our value, making it even more certain that the only person who lost was the one who betrayed you.