What can Women Learn from Men about Parenting?

Bayo Ajibola

Women Learn from Men about Parenting: It is quite evident that men and women approach parenting in different ways. Generally, men are not the primary care givers and probably have an outlook that is a little bit far from the situation but ironically this can be quite helpful and effective in raising kids.

Unfortunately, sometimes there may be a bit of pride factor where women think they know best about how to raise their children. Women know from the onset that it is their role to be the primary parent to their child. But there are several things that women can learn from men about parenting.

Be more flexible

Mothers frequently stick to rules and may get frustrated when there is no precise following of schedules. For instance, bedtime is a common source of stress for moms, but dads do not worry too much if a child goes to bed a little later than usual.

Certainly, it is possible to overdo it and get too careless about routines and rules. Moms and dads can balance each other out and help their children follow the rules. So if moms can learn to loosen up and stress less, they can have more fun parenting.

Be assertive

Men expect compliance the first time and this is something women can learn from them. When a child tests a mother’s limits, sometimes she is too patient, overly nice and at times too forgiving. Perhaps she has to ask several times for a child to clean up their room before they finally do it.

On the other hand, dads tend to have the expectation that a child will do exactly as ordered the first time. Children learn quickly that dad will not tolerate bad behavior. Women can be like men and have high standards that their children must meet as soon as possible. There is no need to be mean, just firm.

Simplicity is key

Women can learn about the power of simplicity from men. This is because women tend to try and outdo each other in almost everything and this does more harm than good to their self-esteem. For instance, a woman will go to great lengths to have a customized cake and homemade decorations for a toddler’s birthday party.

This may be an impractical expectation that women put on themselves. A dad on the other hand will order food from outside and have a simple party. Men know that they cannot achieve perfection all the time and so they do not stress about it. Women need to learn how to simplify and let go of parenting perfectionism. They also need to trust that men can take charge of things.

Have a separate identity from your children

One lesson that women need to learn from men about parenting is to differentiate or separate themselves from their children. Moms work extra hard so that their kids can have the best. However, most mothers unintentionally over-identify with their kids.

Fathers are generally easy on realizing that a child’s performance or behavior does not necessarily reflect on them. Women need to draw an emotional difference between themselves and their children.


Bayo Ajibola

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