Choosing Godparents for Your Child

Bayo Ajibola

How to Choose Godparents for Your Child : Starting out on the journey of parenthood brings you countless challenges and naturally, you embrace them as they come. It may take some time but you eventually get the hang of it and learn to think on your feet. You are everything to that baby and that makes you feel so important and sometimes overwhelmed. Then one day you have a nightmare about something really bad happening to you and you start wondering what would happen to your baby then. Who would take good care of your child in your absence?

For some the answer to that question is obvious because they have great relationships with their parents or siblings but for others it may take some time for them to come up with an appropriate answer. Families are different with some that seem to be directly from hell and are therefore unreliable. This is where you think of appointing godparents for your child.

Appointing godparents is usually a practice of the religious folk among us but anyone can do it. It calls for careful consideration though because the role of godparent isn’t a small one. Just think about it for a minute. This person will be there to guide your child as they grow up and of course you wouldn’t want them encouraging your child to do all the wrong things. Their work doesn’t begin when you die or are incapacitated but when the child needs it. There will be moments when your teenage daughter won’t listen to you. Can you trust that godparent to get her to see sense? Would you be comfortable leaving them alone for long?

What to look for

For this to work you must definitely have the same beliefs and have the same moral stand about issues. You don’t want your child to pick up funny habits or beliefs that you don’t agree with.

Like with any child, the most important thing is love. The person or couple who gets this role should be able to love your child unconditionally just like you would. It beats the purpose of this arrangement if the child is going to suffer. A child who has lost their biological parents needs a little more patience and understanding to allow them to cope with the changes so the godparents need to be sensitive to the child’s needs while allowing them the space to grieve and grow.

Some parents want their kid’s godparents to be people they can turn to for advice about raising their kids without getting any judgmental responses; a safe space, so to speak. You’ll agree that there is a lot of judgment being passed around especially for first-time parents, young parents and those that look a little too ‘modern’.

Resist the urge to pick someone because they’ll be offended or annoyed if you don’t. That they will not take it well has nothing to do with how well they’ll take care of your kid. And if it does it most definitely doesn’t give a good picture of them.


Be careful of this

Sometimes you have one person in mind but their spouse isn’t up to the task. Either talk to both of them or choose a couple that would be all in. You can also choose one who is single. They’ll explain to their future spouse, right? Well, let’s hope this imaginary future spouse will embrace this role with positivity.

Some couples never get round to choosing godparents because one party isn’t for it. Even that is okay because it’s not mandatory to pick them. It’s more of a precaution so that your mind rests knowing your children will be in good hands.

As you choose from your friends, remember that relationships can also break down or fizzle out over time. That isn’t to discourage you from choosing friends as godparents, but more to remind you to choose wisely.

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Bayo Ajibola

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