When a couple communicates with love, the feeling of togetherness, and understanding between them increases. It is important to remember that communication goes far beyond ordinary conversations about the day’s commitments and children’s activities. It should include any thoughts, feelings, or goals.
Communication to such an extent has the power to contribute to respect between the couple, reduce conflicts, and increase love. If you want to communicate better with your spouse, but their answers don’t seem to go much further than “yes”, “no”, “maybe”, you can help them by applying the following techniques:
1. Accept the differences
The sooner you recognize and accept (without judging or criticizing) the differences between you and your spouse, the more easily communication will flow between you. This will happen as you become more understanding and attentive to your partner’s interests.
2. Show interest when your spouse is speaking
If you are reading this article it is because you want to help your husband or wife communicate better, right? So, when your partner starts talking, listen! It seems obvious, but it is not. During the day-to-day hustle and bustle, it is common not to stop to listen to what the other has to say. Do not interrupt your partner, listen attentively, and speak when they are done.
3. Ask questions that help you express yourself
If when you ask your husband what the day was like he answered only “good” (like the vast majority of men), ask more questions that will help him express his feelings. In the example above, you could add “and what happened today at work?”, “How did you feel about it?” The same goes for your wife.
4. Listen actively
Talking is not just listening. It is also to interact. Rephrase what he said with your words. By doing so, you demonstrate that you are interested and understand what your partner said. If he does not understand correctly, he will have the opportunity to correct and try to express himself in another way.
Sincere compliments greatly improve communication, as he will feel more confident and able to express his feelings. Praise your wife or your husband. Admire their kindness and let them know that you appreciate them for all their good deeds. You may also buy them gifts or throw surprise parties for them when you can. Just show your partner that you love and care about them.
6. State your intentions
If you have to address a difficult subject, identify and state your intentions first. This way, your partner will understand that your goal is to strengthen the relationship and solve a problem, and not criticize or complain about it. So, instead of starting a conversation by saying that your spouse spends a lot of time watching TV when they should pay more attention to you, start by saying that you would like to spend more time with them. This would strengthen your relationship.
7. When you are together, hang up the phones
I know it’s not always practical to keep the phone off when we’re together, but be willing to hang up for extended periods so you can have uninterrupted conversations. Talking to your spouse is always better than texting someone else.
Also, when you get home, make sure you are not on the phone. End the conversation on the sidewalk, so you can give your family your attention the moment you enter the house.
Good communication is an extremely important habit in marriage. And, like any habit, it takes time to materialize. So don’t be discouraged. Be persistent and you will have a pleasant result.