Long term deadbedroom she’s 35 I’m 37 with two children 5 and 7. We have had sex 3 times in the last 5 years two of which this year (more later) Prior to kids sex was ok maybe once a month tops but pretty plain vanilla sex. She said she could go without sex and it is over rated.
At the beginning of the year I said I was leaving we had tried counselling and nothing had changed we were not getting on well at all but then lockdown! I had to stay.
We had crisis talks in Feb and decided to have one more go. I told her the lack of intamacy was a big issue and we decided to have an early night to try move past it. Sex was ok but to be expected after so long.
Anyway fast forward to July we are getting on better and I asked if she fancied an early night she couldn’t than weekend as was time of month but said next weekend.
It happened on the Sunday. She wouldn’t let me go down on her there was no foreplay other than a bit of touching and she wouldnt really let me near her breasts kept pulling her top back over then into sex and finish. Rolls over and sticks Netflix on. Almost the definition of duty sex.
Anyway next day she leaves her phone open on side with a message from her mate saying she was dreading it and just wanted it over she then goes on to say it wasn’t so bad and wifey duty done.
Her mate responses he will be after it more often now her response ” god no” charming eh!
It’s not even the lack of sex it’s the lack of hugs kisses affection sigh. But I won’t be asking her again.
I guess it’s not a question as such I know my lot now and the choice is simple stay for the kids in a loveless marriage with no sex (from her) or move on into the great unknown.