Nowadays, much is said about self-love. In times when it is preached that we need to look good, rich, and be successful in everything, people feel needy, repressed, confused, and diminished for not being what advertising, media, and the system spread as a formula for personal fulfillment and success.
What is self-love?
Self-love is how we feel about ourselves if we can accept ourselves as we are. True self-love means accepting our perfections, imperfections, weaknesses, physical and mental status, our flaws, and looks.
It doesn’t depend on the acceptance, admiration, and approval of others to feel good. This does not mean that we are going to settle down and not try to improve. Self-love is being supporters of ourselves, in all our weaknesses and vulnerabilities.
Our conduct is reflected in our relationship with others because if we understand ourselves, we can better understand our partner and others. It is only when we love ourselves that we can truly love others.
10 attitudes that can help us love ourselves better in order to love our spouse and have a better relationship.
It is knowing and accepting your reality, seeking to be better than you were and not better than others.
Knowing who you are and what you want enables you to value yourself. It helps you to know your worth and that you are in no competition with anyone.
2. Take care of yourself
Taking care of the body, the mind and your emotions is a form of self-love.
You should keep yourself clean, dress well, and speak like the responsible person you are.
3. Knowing how to say no, when necessary
There are moments that, out of self-love, we need to say no to situations that threaten our peace of mind and may go further to hurt us. There is no problem with that replying in the negative.
you should not always say yes even when the situation doesn’t align with your values and ideologies. Saying is no is not a sign of weakness or wickedness but reveals self-respect.
4. Develop our internal strength
When we recognize our power and strengthen our will, we are no longer influenced by the desires, vibrations, and impositions of others. When this happens, you realize you don’t need to seek validations from anyone to feel good about yourself.
5. Accept our vulnerabilities and errors
It is necessary to understand and accept that we are not perfect and that we will not always know how to do what is best. We can learn from mistakes and imperfections, and gradually improve ourselves. Mistakes teach us how to live and show us other ways to do things better.
6. Find meaning in existence
Each person, however simple and modest, has their importance and value. To live in love is to find meaning in one’s own life.
7. Do not be influenced by the judgment and approval of others
When we do not have self-love, we put ourselves in second place before others, and we stop doing what we like for fear of others’ disapproval. When we stop being ourselves, it is difficult to love yourself. You can only love your partner; wife, husband, boyfriend, or girlfriend when you love and value yourself.
8. Not pleasing others too much to feel valued
By trying to please others at all costs, we end up becoming puppets, without personality and without self-love. You should learn not to do things that portray you to be weak, thus makes other people disrespect you and speak to you in an unruly manner.
9. Keep your distance from certain people
There are times that in order not to harm ourselves, we need to distance ourselves from those who, for lack of self-love, seek to affirm themselves over us. When you do this, it shows your strength and love for yourself which enables you to approach your partner better.
10. Recognize the human self
To assume ourselves as we are, with the thorns and flowers of humanity, and recognize our vulnerability is to be truly human.
All of these attitudes contribute to developing awareness of ourselves. When we have a perception of who we are, we can better understand ourselves and our partner more.