Girlfriend is upset I let a nursing assistant help me with pooping, and not her.

Bayo Ajibola

We have been in relationship for 2 years. Exclusive during the entire relationship. This girl is caring, loving, understanding, funny, sweet, charming, smart, and very responsible. Very very loyal too .

I had an accident weeks ago. I wont delve into this too much. I needed therapy to strengthen my lower body, so I’m admitted to the hospital for a couple of retests and a physiotherapy test of some type where I have to show the doctor if my lower body can perform certain movements and take certain weights. I’m in a different wing from the COVID patients, super well away so we are very safe.

My girlfriend is an essential worker (not a nurse) therefore she could move around with a lot more of flexibility. She has been staying with me with the exception of when she has her shift. Yesterday morning I had to take a dump. I can stand and walk to the bathroom, but the main problem is, you know that part when you have to push a little for the poop to come out? Yeah I can’t push too hard as I will be putting pressure on my lower body so I need to lean forward a bit against the wall across the toilet or lean on someone standing over me while I poop.

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In our house, I can reach the wall, however in the hospital room’s bathroom, I can’t because it’s too wide. I took laxatives for the first few days of the accident in order to avoid the pushing but it was put on hold 2 days ago to prepare for the test yesterday. At this point my back hurts and I thought what a shitty timing to poop because it would be difficult for me to wipe my ass and wash it (i like to wash it with water after).

So my girlfriend offered to be that person I can lean on while I poop. She said it so nonchalantly that I stared. Like it was no big deal for her “Okay let’s go you can lean on me while you poop.” Of course I didn’t let her be that person, cause it’s awkward! I said no, just go to the nurse station and ask if someone can assist me and she said “I’m already here why do you need someone else” but I was really feeling the ought to poop and had no time for arguments so I raised my voice just a tiny bit and told her to just get some help!

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So she did. A nursing assistant came and helped me do it. When I was done, I went out and my mom is there looking pretty annoyed. She said my girlfriend was upset and crying and told my mom that she is my partner so I should be comfortable to ask her for that kind of help. I don’t know how to react. I just thought why would I let my Girlfriend do that which is embarrassing and disgusting for her My Girlfriend’s point is that why am I more comfortable to be in that kind of vulnerable position with another woman (the nursing assistant) and not with her? My mom is on her side.

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The main reason I really didn’t want her to do it is because I was embarrassed and I don’t want her to lose her attraction for me. ? Now she’s feeling like I don’t trust her enough and that if I see a future with her I should be comfortable being vulnerable on that level with her and to be honnest I see her point now but I just don’t know how to fix this? She went home now and will probably (HOPEFULLY) come back tomorrow, which is my last day here.

How do i fix this naijaparents? I’m not very good at expressing my emotions so I don’t know. Is she a keeper or too emotional?


Bayo Ajibola

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