Bayo Ajibola


Amidst the myriads of explanations of the origin of Valentine’s Day, one thing remains sure – this day and the activities that accompany its arrival is here to stay, assuming the coming generation doesn’t get to phase it off…a possibility we do not see coming especially with the obvious delight and glee with which our young minds welcome the day. With this growing popularity especially amongst the young folks, most couples have decided that the safest thing to do will be to incorporate the activities of their teens into their own on this particular day so as not to leave them exposed to a lot of the wild partying and random acts of immorality that usually greet the day.

Yes, February 14 has come and gone… and today is just a few days over a month from then, a perfect time to analyze if the sizzling moments your teens probably had, didn’t leave them a handful of dark secrets and skeletons in the cupboard. This is important because most of the situations they choose to hide from adults and parents are not issues that they are informed sufficiently enough to be able to deal with. For parents who may want to believe that they are raising angels within their household, they even have a greater responsibility to ensure negative elements from society do not break their wings. But for those parents who sincerely understand that anyone is capable of anything, a few tips here could help you detangle your child from a brewing situation in which he or she may be bound to make a serious blunder that may end up embarrassing the entire family.

The number one issue most teens are confronted with after a month of the “D-day” is… yes you guessed right, UNWANTEDPREGNANCY. Getting pregnant or getting someone so is something that should elicit champagne popping and boundless joy. But when it becomes a news that leaves the both parties distressed, it is such a sad case. You may have done so much to keep them on the path of morality, sacrificed time and mental resources and all, but as a parent who just discovered that his/her 15-year old is an expectant mother or father, what should be your first reaction?  There is no perfect answer to this question and no hard-and-fast rules here. The important thing to know is that whatever your choice of action, let it be a well-considered and timely step with the interest of your teen and your family at heart.

Another case which most teenagers would have discovered by now is their status as regards to sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). Due to the sense of urgency, ignorance and sometimes naivety, most teens could discover they’ve been infected with an STD on a day like this. When you notice your teen now itches around the pubic area, or sometimes pinch at his crotch or rubs on it by putting his both hands into his pocket to avoid drawing attention, do not refrain from asking some questions. Find out if it really is just the hotness of the weather or you both might need to visit a doctor. Try to get him/her to relax and accept you as someone that wants to help, instead of scold him/her for his mistake and promiscuity. If he’s not sure of what he is experiencing, take him along with you to the doctor anyway.

Yet another monster which could cripple your teens happiness and comfort after St. Valentine’s Day is heartbreak. Your daughter may have finally discovered that what she taught was love, was just a game…and now she’s lost it all. This could bring feelings of dejection and intense loneliness. If these feelings are allowed to run loose, suicide or murder could result. If you notice your teen experiencing long periods of depression such as these, take the initiative to address every emotion fully. Talk to her as a friend, make her understand what only you could know as her dad or mom. Then leave her in the friendly hands of time…she’ll come to see the truth in all you’ve said and will cherish the bonds you both share more than ever.

Valentine’s Day was a day of love and lovers, it shouldn’t bring shame along with it. But in any eventuality, do not ignore the sign. Yes, teens make a lot of mistakes, and that is because they came from adults who are not perfect themselves. Handle them with every care they deserve no matter the circumstance… your kids are too precious to lose.


Bayo Ajibola

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