Some couples try to discover, by themselves, the real secret to having a happy and lasting marriage. Amid so many fights and arguments, where they insult each other, causing malaise, sadness, crying, they seek an answer to the following questions: how to save my marriage? How can we restore fellowship? Is there still a way?
In this article, 7 important steps can help couples in the search for a healthy relationship.
1. Recognize mistakes
Learn to recognize and identify your mistakes. It is a simple step, but it will require a couple of efforts. This step is very important because today’s couples do not know how to identify where they are going wrong in a relationship. Whenever there is a disagreement, they blame each other instead of reaching an amicable agreement. Many want to discover how to save their marriage but overlook this little but important detail that makes all the difference.
A very practical example is when there is an argument between the two and neither of them can apologize, recognizing that there has been a communication error. This attitude allows for the development of one of the most destructive villains in a couple’s life: self-pride.
2. Make sacrifices
Most of the time, we need to put some of our wills in sacrifice if we are to have a happy relationship. We are not saying here that the couple will have to suffer a huge discomfort for mutual good. There just has to be some form of compromise from one or both parties for a positive impact.
The couple needs to think about building a foundation so that the marriage does not fall into the routine. Both parties should give more attention to their partner. Going to the movies, strolling in the mall, taking a trip for two can be a good solution to get out of the dull routine and join the bonds again.
3. Learn to nurture respect
Dealing with the spouse’s indifference may be very difficult to accept at first, more is necessary if the goal is to keep the flame of love burning. One of the meanings of the word respect which originates from Latin means “to look again”. So, something that deserves a second look is something worthy of respect. Respect in a marriage is necessary when you understand the importance that each plays in the relationship.
The man must respect his wife and the woman, her husband. If in marriage both have lost respect, understanding, it will be very difficult to create bonds of understanding and love. Knowing the secret of “how to save my marriage” is not simply knowing, it is necessary to nurture real practices for the couple’s well-being.
4. Rebuild the dialogue
Lack of dialogue in your marriage can be the main factor at the beginning of a separation. In many cases, couples fail to communicate due to the rush of everyday life, work, children, friends, and these cause their spouse to withdraw, as there is no longer the dialogue that was so common in the relationship.
Try to reconstruct this dialogue again with your partner so that there is no greater distance in the sentimental life and in the intimacy that the couple has to foster. You can drop your kids at their grandparents’ or a trusted relative’s house so you can have a personal time with your spouse.
Separate moments of conversation, put things in order, even if it is very difficult at that moment, but remember: every sacrifice will be worth it in the long run.
5. Try to trust your spouse more
Trust is one of the most important virtues in any relationship. If there is no trust in your marriage, how will it survive? Something may have hurt your trust, perhaps some situations that have occurred between you but do not be discouraged from fighting for your marriage.
Know that God has given you the most precious asset of this life; your family. Put your trust in God and let him take care of your married life.
6. Don’t bring up past mistakes
Remembering bad things that occurred just to hurt your spouse is not a good idea. Make a reflection of your life and forget everything that made you unhappy. Focus only on maintaining a correct relationship with your partner.
There is nothing more frustrating than coming across the things of the past and tying it down your spouse’s throat. Create bonds of understanding, love, and forgiveness in times of difficulty.
7. Strengthen Intimacy
How can I save my marriage if my spouse is no longer looking for me? How can I relate to a person who only comes to me when he needs me?
Perhaps this is happening to you at the moment and the situation has gone from bad to worse. Don’t be discouraged now. As frustrating as this situation may seem, know how to identify the reason for the distance.
Create strategies to get your spouse’s attention. Offer him or her a romantic dinner or even invite him/her out on their own.
Intimacy means “Characteristic of what is intimate, relaxed or informal” so realize that being intimate is being relaxed and informal, this leads us to a very clear conclusion: Invest in your happiness and win the attention of your spouse at all costs.
These tips when properly adhered to will help you overcome the marital crisis and save your dwindling marriage.