I’m very confused as I type this. My traditional marriage and wedding have been scheduled to hold on 30th December. Barely two weeks from now but currently, I do not think I can go ahead with that marriage. This is because I am seeing too many red flags from my to-be husband and I don’t think I can deal with these behaviors.
The guy in question is very rich but rude. He speaks to people like they don’t matter. He feels that if you are not rich, you don’t have a future. He talks and looks down on people and that annoys me. I have tried talking to him about this character of his but nothing changed. He just tries as much as possible to speak to me with respect but certain remarks he makes shows that he doesn’t truly respect me.
I feel he is just trying to be nice to me because we are about to get married. I didn’t date him. We were just connected by a friend 8 months ago and we have only been speaking to each other over the phone. We finally got to meet two months ago but I didn’t really notice these things because we didn’t stay together for long.
Just last month when our marriage plans became serious that we started spending time together. He already came for my introduction and paid my bride price. This guy is very hot tempered and he once slapped his niece for getting his bottle water late. Ordinary bottle water. It is so disheartening. What will happen when I don’t finish cooking early? What of my kids? Does that mean we can’t make mistakes?
He doesn’t even listen to my suggestions. He doesn’t want me to advise him or make any contributions. When we were planning for our wedding, I told him there were certain things I can handle like the cake and decoration because my friend does it but he refused. He said he doesn’t want any local thing because of his friends and Class. This brought a little misunderstanding between us. I even had a problem with my friend because I already told her she will handle them.
It was very difficult for me to apologize to her for it and up till now our communication is shaky. Can you imagine that he didn’t even allow me to pick my own makeup artist? He did everything himself and that annoys me. He had to send his sister to take me to the market to buy clothes. This man is so domineering and even though he tries to hide it, I still see through him.
I am no longer happy around him. It doesn’t push me to see him or be with him. It is as if I am avoiding him because I am sure he will certainly annoy me before the day runs out. I am really confused. I don’t know if he will change or I will just learn to live with him. Everything has been put in place. So much money has been spent on clothes, shoes, drinks, food and all. I don’t know how to call everything off.
If I cancel this marriage now, it will bring shame to my family. My parents will be so disappointed in me. They are really happy that I’m getting married and this guy is comfortable too. I am the first daughter so you can imagine how happy they are. I really want to make them happy but my own happiness is at stake. Should I just marry this guy and endure it probably learnt to love him and overlook his flaws? Or I should just risk it and cancel the wedding. I am really confused. It’s just about two weeks away. Is it too late to cancel it? I need help urgently.