I want to relocate with my child without the consent of her father.

Please keep me anonymous. This is very important to me and it is very urgent as well. I am a single mother to a lovely girl. I had her when I was in the University and I was dating her father then. When I got pregnant, I told him about it and he clearly made it known to me that he would support whatever decision I take. However, after thinking about it for a long time, I concluded that I was going to keep the child. When I told him about it, I was expecting his support but he got angry and told me that he wasn’t ready to father a child yet and advised me to get rid of it. He sent me money but my mind was already made up. I was going to keep the child and that angered him the more.

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All through the pregnancy months, he was absent, he never called me nor asked of me. He never sent me money for baby things or even food for myself, he was shamelessly absent. Even when I delivered, I called him but he didn’t take my calls. I texted him and there was no reply. After some time I got tired of seeking to hear from him so I learned to live with my child alone and fend for her. It has not been easy because my family are still disappointed with me for having a child outside. When the child was old enough to start school, I registered her with my surname. Since her father was absent, I didn’t see the need for her to bear his surname.

I recently got an opportunity to relocate and they need the father’s consent but I can’t provide that. I have not spoken with him since when I got pregnant and insisted on having the baby. I do not want to have anything to do with him. He has been absent for a long time and I am not willing to let him back into my life or that of my daughter. Some people think I should just reach out to him politely and ask him for his consent. I haven’t seen this man in a long time and I don’t know how to approach him. I also have a feeling that he won’t be receptive at all. He is quite mean and that is not something I am willing to face at a time like this.

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I need suggestions from all of you. If you have ever been in my shoes or know a better way out, kindly let me know. I will be reading the comments. I love my child a lot and I don’t want anything to happen to her. I also can’t live without her. This is a good opportunity for me to be able to have a better life, not just for myself but for my baby as well. Please if you have a valid idea on how I can go about all these things, please share. Thank you.