My husband and I got married seven years ago. It was a beautiful marriage until he lost his job. We used to live in Abuja but this got bad and he was sacked from the office. I had a job as well so we were surviving on what I made and some savings we had before he lost his job. We lived in the Abuja metropolis and the rent was high. We kept managing while he looked for a job. We were very very optimistic and I believed that he would get another job and things would get back to normal. However, contrary to what we both expected, a good job wasn’t forthcoming. The offers he got could barely feed us and the children not to talk of school fees and rent.
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As a result of this, he turned down those jobs and didn’t get a juicier offer. Our rent expired and we begged our landlord to bear with us. He gave us a grace of two more months and we still couldn’t pay up. We had no other option that to move out of the house. We stayed at a friend’s place for about two weeks and finally decided to move to his family house in Calabar. We sold off some property and left Abuja for Calabar. Since then, we have been surviving on what we made from the property we sold. Initially his parents were accommodating but things have become really bad between us. The mother has changed and she gets angry easily and attacks me for almost everything.
She blames me for her son’s predicament and said I’m lazy, that’s why I couldn’t care for my family when her son lost his job. Honestly, with each passing day, it gets tougher staying with her. My husband has gotten a job here in Calabar and although the pay is not as good as what he got before, it is enough to feed us, pay the school fees and fix other needs and since we don’t pay house rent, it is easier for us. My husband is still very kind to me but the heat from his mother is too much. I have a small business which I run from home. I bake confectioneries and supply to schools and some stores and since I do it at home, I have long contact with my mother in-law who is a thorn in my flesh.
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My husband is aware that his mother doesn’t like me and he has tried talking to her but nothing changed. Now, even though things are not that stable for us yet I’m terms of finance, I have been begging my husband for us to move out to a cheap house no matter how small it is. At least, I will have more peace and stay aware from his mother’s demeaning words. He doesn’t agree with me because he wants to be able to afford a comfortable house. His family house is a duplex which has large space and rooms for us but I don’t feel at peace because of his mother. He feels we shouldn’t be uncomfortable elsewhere when his house is comfortable. I am not complaining. I can manage a small house as long as we have peace. I don’t know how else to convince him.