It’s perfectly okay to feel loneliness and yearn for companionship.

Bayo Ajibola

I often come across many discussions about people seeking to find relationships, feeling lonely etc, particularly now during quarantine.

Unfortunately I keep seeing the same tired suggestions like “focus on yourself” or “you can’t expect others to fill a void and make you happy” blah blah blah.

These types of statements just don’t speak truth to the harsh reality that we’re all humans and therefore we crave intimacy, companionship and conversation. Many are able to get these things much easier than others and these are typically the people trying to give the advice.

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There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to vent and feel lonely, it’s completely normal. Another thing I think most people often ignore is the fact that societal pressure makes everything 10x difficult to deal with. You tune in to the radio and everything you hear are songs about love and sex, when you go outside in public and you see those couples holding hands and laughing, you hangout with your buddies and they all bring their wives/husbands and you simply have to sit by yourself…the list goes on and on making you feel even worse.

Just imagine putting these people down and telling them “work on bettering yourself” as if there’s something wrong with them in the first place. We are who we are and there is somebody out there who will appreciate that. You will find loads of people out there with very successful careers, a ton of money, and yet still single… why you ask; Because There is way more to life and finding your special person than just saying “better yourself.”

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Honestly for people who are struggling right now with being single, men and women, don’t be worried about it because we are right there with you and here to give you some hope. THERE IS somebody out there waiting to meet you, we promise! Just hang in there and continue to be yourself. Don’t change yourself for someone else.

While this is definitely a great time to pickup new hobbies or perhaps fit in some regular exercise, do those things because you truly want to, not because you think it will help you meet someone.


Bayo Ajibola

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