I am a troubled middle-aged man with a kleptomaniac for a girlfriend and I don’t know how to handle it. I met my partner just before I left university and she had just joined. We’ve been dating for about five years and it has honestly been a happy ride.
I recently noticed she has this very bad habit of stealing and lying. She tells such petty lies it leaves me asking why she would lie about such small things. The same goes for the things she steals. She’s stolen clothes, makeup, and perfume from her friends and it’s not like she doesn’t have some of her own or can’t afford to get more. She even stole ketchup from a restaurant once.
Dealing with this is quite frustrating especially because I’ve told her if she needs anything she can always ask me and I’ll buy it for her. Nobody knows about this behavior, not even her parents. We’re yet to get married and she’s currently living with her aunt and she’s stolen a lot of her aunt’s and cousin’s things too. She brings it all to my place.
She’s not sorry
I’ve tried speaking to her but her response always sounds arrogant. She doesn’t sound remorseful, doesn’t want to give them back, keeps lying, and keeps bringing more. It’s really frustrating and I’ve lost my cool in the heat an argument. Instead of being sorry she acts like she’s the victim. I’ve threatened to expose her, bullied her and once got physical on her. I don’t like who I’ve become in all this but I also don’t want to blame my actions on her.
I have contemplated leaving the relationship but that feels like a heavy decision considering the length of time we’ve been together in comparison with when this habit started. She has never cheated on me and is otherwise a good person. could she be possessed by the devil or something?
I have chosen to keep praying for her. What more can I do to help her without losing sight of who I am? Should I tell her parents? She’s not listening to me right now and we’ll just end up fighting if I bring it up again. I just want her to stop all this. What to do?