My girlfriend of one year is nothing but a scam. How do I get over her?

Please do not reveal my identity. I feel really heartbroken as I write to you. I am in my late thirties and all my life, I have been very honest, kind and fair in all my dealings with people especially when it has to do with the opposite sex. My relationship life has been a bit great but I always kept a positive spirit. I have had some failed relationships, most of which I can’t explain the real reason behind. However in all these relationships, I was always the one hurt and ditched. I wanted to settle down very early so that I can raise my kids when I am still young and healthy. It is really sad that I am almost clocking forty and I haven’t even found someone to spend the rest of my life with. I have attained pronounced financial stability and I can afford almost anything I wish but I am not happy. It seems that women only come to me for what they can benefit and not necessarily because they love me or want to be there for me at all times. What made me realize that truly, most ladies are after my money is because of what happened to me recently.

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I have been dating this lady for almost one year now only for me to find out that she was with me just for financial benefits. To crown it all, she wanted to scam me as well. I met her at a concert here in Lagos, we vibed a lot and exchanged contacts. One thing led to another and we continued talking. She was really nice to me, she always called to check up on me. Even after we met, I wasn’t really into her, I didn’t call her until after one week when I remembered her. I called her and she was pleased to hear from me. After that, I didn’t call again. Two weeks later she called and continued calling me time and again. That was how we began to get close to each other. She was doing most of the calling until after some time when I began to reciprocate her calls. To cut the long story short, we got very close and we started dating. However, I began to observe certain negative things about her.

She was always calling me before we started dating and four months after we began to date, I realized that she was no longer calling me as before. When I asked, she said it was because she was busy at work. She improved and even moved in with me shortly after that. We kept staying together and I was footing most of the bills, I loved her so those things were nothing. I also had the money so I didn’t stress much. I gave her my ATM pin because I trusted her. She also got some of my personal details because I saw a future with her. She was nice, homely, a good chef and a smart lady. I wasn’t bothered about knowing many of her personal details because I didn’t see the need for it. Currently, I realized that all the while she was with me, she was sending out my personal details to someone I assume is her real boyfriend. There was a time that I lost up to 800 thousand which I couldn’t trace. It was just recently that I found out that she was behind the missing money including many other things I’ve lost. 

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How did I find out? I noticed she was being a bit secretive about her laptop. She gave me free access to her phone but she guarded her laptop with jealousy even when she had access to mine. I contacted my tech friend and told him about it. I wanted to marry her so I didn’t want to be with someone that I couldn’t trust. He advised against checking the laptop but I insisted. He later gained access to the laptop and we found out that she has been stealing from me all these while. She has stolen about 5.7 million Naira since we met. I am not the only person she scams, there are many other people including women. I don’t know how I feel. I hate myself right now. She wasted my time, money, effort, resources and more. The worst is that my heart is in pieces. I don’t know how to handle this condition. What can I do?