I am confused and that is why I am writing to you. All my efforts to handle this on my own have proven futile and that’s why I decided to seek help from this your community. It is about my husband. We have been married for two years now and he doesn’t allow me go home to see my parents. Before we got married, he had a little fall out with my parents and since then it has changed the relationship between him and my family members. I have deeply apologized on behalf of my family but he has remained adamant to all my pleas.
The problem started when they gave him list for traditional rites. The list was a long one and he pleaded with my family to reduce the list so that it would be more affordable for him since he wasn’t all that wealthy. He pled that only the important things be added especially those that were majorly required by the kinsman but my father insisted that they were all important. I also begged my parents but my father was too stubborn for my liking. I have never been very close with my father which was one of the reasons why we couldn’t agree. He said it was his decision to make and not mine.
My husband found out from his friend who was also from my village that the list could be modified and it was my family that didn’t want to modify it. My husband asked to confirm this and I told him the truth. He has been very furious since then. I wasn’t working so I couldn’t even contribute anything to the marriage preparation. He paid for everything and spent beyond his budget. Since then, he has refused to hear anything about my family. He doesn’t call them, he doesn’t even send them money, the relationship between them is almost nonexistent.
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I haven’t gone home since I got married and it is very painful for me. My husband is a good man and regardless of everything, he had never given me any reason to doubt his love for me. He treats me well and I understand why he is unhappy with my family and he had every reason to be. I just need a way to get him to forgive my family and at least allow me to go and see them. I can’t go against his will.