Please hide my identity. I am a 31 year old woman and I have two great kids and a husband who was once supportive but has suddenly changed to something I can’t explain. We got married when I was in school. I was in my final year and I came from a family that values education. My father was a senior lecturer while my mom was a non academic staff member in the University where I schooled. While my husband was still seeking my hand in marriage, we courted for about a year and one of the things I endured I made clear to him as long as we were together was the fact that I love studying and once we get married I was going to pursue my postgraduate studies. He agreed and he knew how much I loved books and reading as a whole.
He assured me that marriage wouldn’t stop me from achieving my goals or reaching the academic peak if I so desired. He spoke in a very supportive way and even then, he ensured I got all the help I needed. When we were writing exams, he reduced the frequency of calls so I could study, he also reminded me of some important things I should read about. He was that supportive so I didn’t even have doubts agreeing to marry him because he seemed to understand me so well. We finally got married with the consent of my parents and his. My father still reminded him of my intentions to further my education and asked him to ensure it happened and he promised to do so.
I later graduated shortly after we got married. I had a child and we still lived in peace. When our child was 5 months, I told him I would like to pursue my masters, at least I could be running it while I nurse my baby. I wasn’t working so I didn’t want to completely be a sit at home mother who does nothing but breastfeed a baby and clean the house or cook. I wanted more and sitting idle at home would not give me that. I thought about it thoroughly before I told him and his reply was nothing good. He turned down my request and said it was not a good idea for me to start a program while my baby was still tender. I understood what he was saying but my baby was 5 months and it wasn’t as if I would start school immediately. I only wanted to start the registration and I know before I finish running everything, my baby would be about a year or at least strong enough for me to care for and still go to school.
I explained to him but he still refused. I didn’t want it to cause problems so I forgot about it. It’s been 4 years and I have another child that is a year and 8 months old. I brought up the issue again and he said there was no money. This is the worst excuse he could give. My husband is a wealthy Businessman. He is currently building a very big house and he has many businesses he is running. Money cannot be the problem and I told him yet he refused. I went ahead to inform him that I can pay my fees with my money but he still refused. He cancelled my plans to pursue my Masters and I think this is the height of it all. I don’t understand why he is not in support of my dreams. I don’t know if he is feeling inferior or something. He stopped at just a degree level and went into business. I hate the way things are turning and I need your advice because if I do what is in my head there may be trouble. Please, how do I handle this?