My husband has refused to touch me since I delivered.

I am frustrated and angry, that is why I chose to come here to share my story and seek a solution. I am a second-time mom and I have always been a plus sized woman. My husband has always been I to plus sized women which was why he married me in the first place. He does not like slim women. When I gave birth to our first child, a girl, everything was okay and we still had a great time. He was so happy that he bought me a Kia car to appreciate me. We have been on good terms since then but when I got pregnant the second time, things began to change and even though I tried to find out what was wrong, I couldn’t. It was as if he was spending more time outside even when I already told him that I needed more hands at home.

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To cut everything short, I began to gain weight during my second pregnancy. I didn’t see it as a problem because it is a normal thing to gain weight during pregnancy. I was craving many things and I couldn’t rest until I get them. I kept on adding but intended to work out after delivery to lose weight. I have delivered but I haven’t been able to go to the gym as planned. I know I gained weight but I am a nursing mother. There’s no way I will be able to start watching weight at this point in time. The main issue right now is that since almost two months that I gave birth, my husband has not touched me at all and I can’t take it anymore.

I have been giving this man signals but all to no avail. I thought that it was because he was waiting for me to heal from delivery before he could start but that’s not the reason. I kept trying to get him to have sex with me but he continued avoiding me like I have some communicable disease. I finally asked him why he has not touched me since but he said he wanted me to get better before he did that. I have told him that I am just according to what the doctor said but it wasn’t enough to change his mind. I later realized that he doesn’t want to have sex with me because I gained weight and not because he wanted me to heal.

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I feel so bad. He said I no longer attract him because of my size but that’s just insensitive and selfish. I was the one who went through all the hassles of childbirth and this is what I get in return; rejection by my own husband who was supposed to be there for me and help me recover. He is barely at home now. He leaves early, sometimes without even telling me. When he’s home, he spends time in the sitting room watching TV or playing games. I haven’t had sex since I delivered and it is frustrating me. I don’t know what this man wants me to do. I have a feeling he is cheating on me because normally, he doesn’t stay this long without having sex. I feel very bad and unappreciated.

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