My husband is far and my sexual needs are rising

Cynthia Eze

2 years ago / 2050 Views

Please hide my identity. I have been married for seven years and I have two beautiful children. My husband is a great man and he is always ready to provide for me and my kids. He loves me and I’m very sure of that. He does a lot of things to make money and give us the best life. About two years ago, during our fifth year of marriage, we were unable to cope. Things were very expensive for us and survival was becoming difficult. His friend talked him into leaving our residential place to somewhere else so as to make a living. I loved him so much that I didn’t want him out of my sight but we were suffering and things were not getting better so I had to let him go. This is almost two years that he has been away from home and I am beginning to feel like I am losing my marriage. Our love and marital life is no longer as before. When he traveled, we used to talk a lot.

We had great communication and we never ran out of things to talk about but that is not the case now. Our communication has degenerated a lot and it worries me so much. Since he left, he has only visited home six times and for each of these visits, he never stayed more than three weeks so we didn’t have enough time to make up for all the times we were apart. He sent money for the upkeep of myself and my children but that was never enough. I loved him, I wanted to see him. He was doing well where he was so he didn’t want to come back. I told him about how I felt. I was very lonely and I had a lot of unmet needs. I needed sex as a married woman that I am but I wasn’t getting that. No matter how much I tried to control it, I could not. I told him so many things and gave him reasons why I wanted him to come home but he didn’t budge. He said he had to make money, take care of us, pay bills and do so many other things. We’ve had that conversation over and over again but things have not changed.

The current situation as I write is that our communication has reduced. Our conversation has become so boring that I am afraid we are both getting tired of eachother. We no longer have serious conversations, all we do is talk about the kids, what we ate and nothing more. I am afraid that my marriage will crash. I no longer miss him as before. It is as if I have gotten used to his absence and the fact that he will never come home to stay. Apart from that, my sexual needs are so high. I miss him and I really want him to come home and satisfy him but I know that’s not possible. So I am thinking of other options. I love my husband and I want to stay faithful to him but I can’t continue waiting for someone who is not coming back anytime soon.

Since he left, I have been a faithful wife, taking care of his kids and sometimes I visit his family. I am a good wife and I know that but I have needs that need to be met. I am thinking of meeting another man to satisfy me. I can’t continue waiting. I have some men that have been asking me out and I am contemplating meeting some of them to satisfy me. I don’t know if this makes me a bad wife but I honestly can’t continue waiting until my husband. I am not even sure that he has been faithful to me. What if he has been seeing and having sex with other women? I am very sure that there is no way my husband will stay this long without sex. I know how much he loves sex and the fact that he doesn’t talk about it make me believe he has someone he is having sex with. I want to know what you think of my decision.