My husband is not emotionally invested in our marriage

Please hide my details before sharing. I am a young lady and I just got married recently. I am 26 and my wedding just held in June of this year. I met my husband through my mom’s friend. She recommended him after vouching for him and how much of a good person he is. He stays in Bayelsa while I reside here in Lagos. It was a long distance relationship and regardless of that, we were still able to keep in touch with each other. He was very much interested in the relationship and it was very obvious because he always called and checked up on me regularly. To be honest, I always had concerns about long distance relationships because of how much they fail these days but when I got into one with him, all my doubts and fears were gotten rid of. He was a very nice person or so he seemed. He cared about me and every single detail of whatever I did. He was always interested in my activities and was always willing to support me both financially and emotionally. 

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He works with a company in Bayelsa while I was in my final year when we were dating. We dated for almost a year and he was very helpful to me when I was in school. In fact, he helped me to pay for so many things including my project and clearance levies. He was very great. When I graduated, we continued talking and making plans for our wedding. All these while, I never noticed anything off or fishy about him. I visited him various times and he was very receptive and open minded. We later got married and it felt as if everything changed. When we got married, he was still very good to me. He always did things for me and cared about my  family but these things did not last. About Two months after our wedding, I began to notice certain changes in him ranging from the way he spoke to me including his disposition towards things. He changed completely. I noticed that he began to become cold towards me. It was as if he was withdrawing and I could do almost nothing about it. 

I kept trying to get his attention but up till now, it is obvious that he is not emotionally invested in this marriage. Initially, I thought I was the problem. I thought that I wasn’t doing something well but when I asked him he said everything was fine. I checked myself and things I wasn’t doing well but I didn’t notice anyone. He still eats my food but that is all. We don’t have any conversations just like normal couples would do. He just goes to work everyday and comes back and I serve him food. I will be going for service next month soon and I don’t know what to expect. If we are not connected now that I am close to him, is it when I travel for service that we will bond? I noticed that he was always talking to someone but when I checked I realized that they were not having any serious relationship. He tells her that he regrets getting married to me and that he is just no longer in love with me. As he said, no matter how he tried, he just couldn’t bring himself to love me or look at me affectionately. 

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He said he loved me before we got married and shortly after our wedding he lost interest. He claims he can’t explain why but he felt like quitting the marriage. The lady has been convincing him to stay back and try to work things out that he may just be overwhelmed by certain things. These were their chats on WhatsApp. I genuinely love this man but I don’t want to be married to someone who doesn’t love me or appreciate me. I am just 26 and I can’t stay in a marriage like this forever. I don’t know what to do about this situation. I don’t know how to approach it or solve the problem. I am considering leaving this marriage now that it is still early but I don’t know if I am going too far. I want things to work out but he seems to have given up on the whole thing. No matter how much I try to make things work, he keeps acting like he has given up on everything about us. I am slowly going into depression. I am not enjoying this marriage at all. I don’t know how things turned so sour suddenly. I am confused.  


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