Please hide my identity. All my life I have sought ways to empower myself and be a better person, financially and in every aspect of my life. I do not come from the richest of homes but I have a supportive and morally upright family. I got married to a man I felt would support my dreams and make life easier for me but I was wrong. Initially he was everything I thought I wanted but currently, he has changed so much and I no longer know if he was the man I married. I do not have a steady job physically but I work online. I am a social media influencer and I help brands sell their products and services. I do a lot of online advertising and I also link buyers to sellers for a specified amount of money. This gives me a lot of money even more than some physical jobs I’ve seen. All I get from this job, I use it to support my husband and provide for my family. Sometimes I pay the kids school fees as a means of supporting my husband. I also buy groceries and do so many other things from my income.
Sadly, my husband thinks the job I do online is not good for a married woman and thus, thinks that I should quit. Initially when he first said this, I thought that he was not serious but as time went on, it was getting serious and beginning to cause problems in my marriage. Growing up, things were not that easy for my family even though my parents worked really hard to provide for us. We were five children and I was the first, as a result of this, I saw the need to do more in order to contribute to what my parents were bringing to the table. As early as 13, I was already selling sachet water on the street. As I got older, I went to people’s home to clean and wash for them after which they will pay me. All I got from these, I gave them to my mom and she appreciated them. In my senior class, we had a neighbor who was a hairdresser, whenever I got home from school, I would go to her shop and learn how to weave hair. She was nice and allowed me to learn for free and I practiced with my younger ones. I later wrote JAMB and passed and while I was in school, I made people’s hair and also did some other jobs that helped me pay bills and books.
A friend of mine later introduced me to social media and explained to me how I could make money from it and ever since then, I have been doing it and I have been earning from. It is as if I have built a world in the social media sphere and leaving would be really difficult for me. The annoying thing is that I met my husband online. That’s one of the reasons why I am still very pissed off. He knows my story, he knows every single thing I do online so I do not understand why he suddenly feels insecure about my job. He feels I should get a normal 8 to 5 job but that’s not who I am. I can’t cope with that kind of job. I have kids to raise and and home to keep in good shape. I do not want to be stressed so much between caring for the kids and keeping the house clean. I need to breathe. My husband has an 8 to 5 job so if I decide to do that, who will take care of the kids?
I have tried to explain all these things to him but he feigns ignorance and insists I find something else to do. Okay, I have asked him for money so that I can go bag to my clothing business but he said he doesn’t have. I used to be a drop shipper so now I want to sell clothes full time and he still says he doesn’t have money. I honestly don’t know what to do at this point. Even if he gives me money for the clothing business, leaving social media entirely will be very difficult for me. I have spoken to his younger sister to help me talk to him but nothing has changed. I don’t know what to do. Please help me. What is the best way to make my husband understand that I am only doing business and nothing me.