My wife always forgets important details about me and our family. I am worried.

Please post this anonymously. I am a young guy of 31. I got married two years ago and I have a child. Just like most newly married couples, I love my wife so much and I am always willing to do whatever she wants me to do for her. I am always available for her physical, emotional, and financial needs. We dated for three years before settling down. In those three years, I knew her as a resilient, hard working and extremely smart woman. She paid attention to details and always knew what to do and how to do it. I have a private business and anytime I was confused, I always turned to her for her advice and she always comes through for me.

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As my partner, I tell her almost every important thing about me ranging from my family to my business. When we were dating, she remembers everything I discussed with her, she even reminds me of important decisions, details or events that I forget. These were some of the reasons why our relationship lasted that long and I even decided to marry her because we had a very good communication and apart from that, she was a genuinely nice person. However, since we got married, things have changed. She is no longer as she used to be when we were dating. These days, she tends to forget a lot of important details, not just about my business but our family as well and it is bothering me.

When I talk to her about my business, she pays attention and asks the right questions but in future, when I bring up something or remind her things I told her earlier and complain about a problem at the shop, she always says I didn’t tell her about it earlier and when I insist I told her, she says she doesn’t remember. She used to be very particular about birthdays and anniversaries. All the while we were dating, she was always looking forward to my birthday and insisted on throwing a party or hanging out together to do something special. She remembers our anniversary and also insists and celebrates how far we have come. However, this year has been different and I am not overreacting. She forgot both my birthday and our anniversary. 

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We didn’t celebrate it as we used to because I’m quite terrible with planning hangouts. I have told her about her sudden forgetfulness and she doesn’t seem to see anything wrong with it. This started early this year and I am very concerned. Sometimes she blames it on motherhood. She says she has been so invested in nursing our baby that she no longer has time for herself or other important or trivial stuff. I am worried, I don’t know if I am overreacting but could it be that nursing the baby is affecting her? I know that motherhood changes one’s life but I don’t want my wife to lose herself because of childbirth. Do other mothers feel this way? Husbands, have you had this experience before? How can I help my wife?

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