Please hide my identity. I wish to know how married men in this space handle things like this because at this point, I am tired and I don’t know what to do. My marriage is barely two years and I have already started telling stories. I love my wife and I wish to save my marriage. Before I met her, she was in a relationship. She was dating one guy that was her senior in University but according to her, they broke up because their families refused to give their consent. Prior to their breakup, they dated for four years. When I came into the picture, it took her time to finally accept my proposal to be her boyfriend even though we started as just friends.
She was heartbroken then but always confided in me and I helped her when she was down. I loved her and after two years we got married. I am a businessman and my business has been going well until recently. I love my wife so much that there is absolutely nothing I wouldn’t do for her. After our wedding, I got her a job with the help of my friend. She works as an assistant lecturer in a state university. I really thought that she had ended things with her ex before we got married. My friends advised me to ensure she was no longer in love with the ex before we got married and when I asked her she gave a positive response. She told me she had healed and moved on.
I just found out that she is still in contact with her ex. I went through her Whatsapp and I saw that they were still talking. They seem very close although I did not see any romantic text. They just admit that they miss each other and wished that things had worked out between them. My wife says she misses him so much and thinks about him sometimes. The guy said he finds himself thinking about the old good times and the fun times they had. The guy is married too and doing quite well. He offered to send my wife money which she declined initially but started collecting recently. My business is having issues but I do not think it’s enough reason for my wife to take money from him.
I told her about my findings and she said it’s because we didn’t have money. The guy has so far sent her 900k and she said she has been using it to run the family. My wife is a good woman and I have never had a reason to regret marrying her but since I found out that she takes money from her ex, I have been feeling bad. My ego is bruised. I also feel like she may start developing feelings for the guy again. It is true my business is struggling but I am trying to make things better. I still provide for them. I don’t know what to do. I have told her to stop communicating with him but how long will it last? I want to save up money and give it to her so that she will return it to the guy. How do I make her stop talking to him at all and move on?