Picking up the pieces when he walks out on you; Single and pregnant

Bayo Ajibola
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Single and pregnant: Being dumped when pregnant is probably the worst nightmare for any woman. Pregnancy is one of the worst times to deal with emotional turmoil and instability. Unlike other single women going through a breakup, the child growing in you is a constant reminder of how unfair life can be. Most of the questions running through your mind will keep you awake and beaten and in the end, you will have no answers.

Instead of beating yourself over some insensitive guy, pick up the pieces and move on with your life. Here is how to do it:

  1. Let go of him – He walked out on you when you needed him most in your life. There is nothing anyone can do to make up for that. Stop holding on to him begging for another chance. Stop trying to make it work or praying that he has a change of heart and comes back. A man that leaves you pregnant and walks out on you does not deserve your love at all.
  2. Learn to love yourself more – When you are invested in a relationship and it suddenly does not work, you may be tempted to try and change yourself to the person your partner wants you to be. It does not work. Instead, love yourself more, be happy about your life. Be content with who you are and nurse your pregnancy worrying about nothing.
  3. Brace yourself for single parenthood – A partner that walks out on you when pregnant is probably not intending to be part of your child’s life. Prepare yourself for single parenthood and work towards being the best parent to your child. If you need to get a job or move to a bigger house, do so in preparation for your child’s birth. Learning and accepting to be a single parent saves you the trouble of trying to get your ex involved in your child’s life.
  4. Believe in your strength to overcome – What does not kill you makes you stronger. Life is full of challenges and it is not until you face a challenge that you discover how strong you are. Believe that what you are going is a passing cloud and you will emerge victorious in the end. Furthermore, you are not the first woman to be walked on when pregnant. Others have been in your shoes and conquered.
  5. Understand that It is probably the best thing for you – It is better to have your man walk out while pregnant instead of him walking out on you having developed a relationship with your child. When pregnant, you can deal with his absence as a grown up but your child may have a difficult time coping. His walking out while you are pregnant saves you from putting up with his crap for the sake of your child. It will hurt, but not as much as when he leaves you later on.


Pregnancy is the most vulnerable time for any woman; At this point what matters is your health and general well being. When your partner chooses to walk out on you, focus on carrying your pregnancy to term and raising your child whether he is present or not. Someone that leaves you at your most vulnerable time does not deserve to be with you. The earlier they leave the better for you and you can move on and rebuild your life without them.

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