All husbands are men but not all men are husbands, preparation makes the difference.
Are you preparing to become a husband? Most times men are so focused on finding the right person that you forget that in the meantime you have to prepare yourselves to become the right husband. Just like you wouldn’t walk into an examination without doing studying you can’t walk into marriage blindfolded and without necessary preparation to become the right husband.
With that being said, here are ten important tips to start preparing yourself NOW to become a husband:
- Do Away With Selfishness
Undoubtedly, every single man thinks about himself alone – pays his own bills, buys whatever he wants, and does whatever he likes/wants but this shouldn’t continue once you start preparing for marriage.
Yes! Once you get into a marital relationship, you have to add the needs of your partner to your own – and even above it. So, as you’re planning to become a husband, start thinking of ways to share your time and resources. Life is not all about you alone anymore, you have to think of your partner and also give freely.
So start changing your mindset now while you’re still preparing and this new mindset of selflessness will flow into your marriage as a result of the changes you make now.
- Give Out More Than You Expect
Indeed, a relationship is all about giving and taking but you shouldn’t always be at the receiving end or be the one expecting more. Learn the art of compromising as you prepare for your marriage. Ditch the mindset of “me, me, and only me.” Imagine if your partner also has a similar mindset, then each of you will cater to individual feelings, needs, desires, and wants – this will not lead to a healthy relationship.
So, as you prepare for marriage, build the mindset of giving 100% and receiving nothing in return. Imagine if your partner has a similar mindset. Then both of you will give 100% and the result will be a selfless, beautiful, love-filled marriage for both you and your wife.
- Lay Aside Pride
You may be something and have the whole world but in a marriage, nobody is the boss. So lay aside your pride. Any man who is bossy and doesn’t know how to say “I’m sorry” will only end up throwing away every friendship and romantic relationship he is blessed with. Why? Because he would be too proud to ever be wrong. And this doesn’t work in any relationship.
Fine! Nobody likes being wrong, but we’re all human and getting wrong is inevitable. So, when you do something wrong, learn to say “I’m sorry.” Lay aside your pride and put on humility to be able to admit your wrongs.
Assuming you’re always right and not apologizing when you go wrong will only grow bitterness in your spouse.
- Learn The Value Of Commitment
Marriage is like a business, if you want to achieve success in your marriage, you must be committed to it. Commitment is not automatic and it doesn’t auto-surface once you get married. You have to learn its value right before marriage and it can start from dating or courtship.
Note: Divorce is not included in God’s original design for marriage as a means of barging out. So, when your wife offends you or does something really hurting, you’re supposed to fix things and not throw her away. Always do everything to make your marriage work.
- Develop An Intimate Relationship With God
This point is very important. Always remember that marriage is a calling – a holy covenant between God, you, and wife. So, you cannot enter into a successful covenant with your wife if you don’t first have one with God. Therefore, develop an intimate relationship with God.
Always seek biblical wisdom, study the word of God constantly, develop a life of prayer, and live a dedicated life for God.
- Learn To Be Faithful Always
Being faithful doesn’t just mean restricting yourself to one woman – though it’s part of it. You have to be faithful in all aspects of your marital relationship. Be faithful with the time you spend with your spouse and in the way you budget your finances. When you’re faithful to the life that you’re trying to live together with your spouse, your spouse will always respect and trust you.
- Learn To Be A Good Leader
As stated above, nobody is the boss in a marriage. Nevertheless, you’re the leader, as ordained by God and culturally acceptable. So, as a husband in the making, you must demonstrate the characteristics of a good leader. Be a president and not a dictator.
In that line, you must always take the lead, confident enough to decide, patient enough to listen, and worthy enough of submission. If you don’t have and can’t find the right answers, ask for help from your spouse.
Being a leader doesn’t mean that all decisions should not be left up to you alone. So, always consult your wife for problem-solving and decision making.
- Learn To Plan Together
Being the husband, your spouse will always count on you for a realistic vision for the rest of your lives and marriage. So, you must ensure that you set marital goals that you can openly discuss and achieve with your spouse. This will inform your spouse that you are responsible and have a good plan and future for your marriage with her.
- Constantly Remix Your Love Language
Just as rebranding and repackaging improve your product look and brand, constantly remixing your love language will improve your marriage. More so, your wife will appreciate your creativity when it comes to showing her how much you love her and how much she means to you.
Always surprise your spouse with new love language and gift and always remember to keep her guessing how next you would show her that you love her.
- Learn To Pray Out Loud
One of the sexiest things you can do to your spouse is randomly grabbing her by the hand and say, “Let’s pray.” Therefore, having a bold prayer life and always praying out loud will show your spouse that you’re also the spiritual head of the house – you’re the head of the house and still answering a higher calling.