You have been in a relationship for some time now and you feel it is time to move things to the next level but your man isn’t making any move in that aspect. This can raise a lot of concerns, questions, doubts, and sometimes fear about so many things. It makes you wonder if you have been wasting your time all these while or if you have not been a great girlfriend, enough to push him to put a ring on your finger.
This is a natural feeling, especially when you love your partner so much and would want to spend your time together in marriage. Sometimes what men need is proof that you are the right person for them. Marriage is a lifetime thing and most people would want to have a happy marriage.
If your boyfriend is taking too long to pop up the big question or make you his lifetime spouse, here are five things you can do to make him do this.
1. Don’t rush things
You need to stay calm and be patient. Men hate women who only think and talk about marriage. This attitude is often seen as insecurity, fearlessness, and imbalance on the part of women. It makes them feel like you are desperate and want to tie them down for some unspoken reasons. Also, no man wants to marry a liability, that is why they take time to study their partners and know if they really want to walk down the aisle with you.
Men, at some point, have feelings of doubt and uncertainty. Truly, they may have thought of proposing to you a couple of times but there’s this fear of responsibilities after marriage. This may have scared him and made him put his foot on the brake and put it off the request. So what you need to do is to be calm and original. Don’t pretend or pressure him. You both should take your time and study each other.
2. Take care of yourself
Some ladies get into relationships and begin to care less about how they look. This is very wrong. Just as you were very conscious about your look before meeting your boyfriend, maintain that energy. Buy beautiful clothes and dress well. Wear a nice perfume and take care of your hair.
Men like women with great self-esteem, well cared for, and perfumed. The interior is also worth it, but a good dose of care with appearance helps a lot. Men love to show off their girlfriend and they can only do this when you are good-looking and smart.
Do not neglect yourself or your looks. Besides, he needs to admire you to start thinking about engagement. For this, you need to take care of your looks, thought patterns, and more. Take time to exercise your body and mind, read good books, watch good movies, do your nails, take care of your skin and hair. Always remember – you first.
3. Don’t try to change him
Some women make the mistake of trying to change their partner. This is very wrong. Every man wants to feel accepted and respected the way he is, with flaws and qualities. You can help him improve and also, drop certain unhealthy behaviors but don’t try to force him or make him feel terrible about himself.
If he smokes and you know it’s unhealthy for him speak to him in a low tone when he is in a good mood and let him see reasons why he needs to quit smoking. You can help him gradually quit smoking. Don’t force him or raise your voice. Smoking cessation is a gradual thing to do and it requires a lot of support and patience.
4. Make room for him and you
Don’t act closed off, selfish, or even try to pressure your partner into marrying you. Let him have his own will and make you part of his life. Go about your normal activities, work, have fun, hang out with friends and be happy. Give him some personal time because if you stay around him too much, he may start feeling trapped and suffocated. Thus, will start to give you less value and even to want to avoid your company.
That way, it is important that you also have time for yourself, to take care of yourself – physically, emotionally, and intellectually – and let him be only a part of your story and not your whole story. After all, you are different people, with different stories, and in order to appreciate each other, this individuality needs to be respected.
5. Let him feel a slight fear of losing you
Don’t lose your worth in his eyes. If you are always available for him when he calls, after some time, you tend to lose your value and self-respect. If your partner feels that you will never leave him regardless of what he does, he will rarely leave this comfortable place and make a serious commitment like an engagement and marriage.
Therefore, let him feel a fear of losing you. Make it a bit difficult for him to have access to you. Do not always be very present, with very easy access, especially if you feel that he is becoming relaxed. Start doing more things on your own, without necessarily asking for his help.
Show him that you have a life outside your relationship. Get busy with work. Set personal goals and work towards achieving them. When he sees that you are ambitious and a goal-getter, he will be afraid to lose you and thus, will appreciate you more.